My first Thanksgiving without my Mom .......

Mom would have been proud of us.  We pulled together a Thanksgiving feast that was tasty and delicious.  I must admit, we did a damn good job making her stuffing and gravy dishes without a recipe.  We had an amazing variety of food and everything was just perfect.  Just like Mom would have done.

The table settings were a tribute to Mom.  The napkin holders had different pictures of Mom.  We had name card place settings made from small pine cones.  Each place had a lit votive candle.  The centerpiece was sent by Mom's beautiful cousin Marilyn.  It was a table filled with love and created out of love for Mom.

Lauren did find one of the pilgrim candles that had never been lit.  So funny.  We only had the boy pilgrim, not sure what happened to the matching girl.   Somebody probably lit her and she melted.  We decided to spare the boy pilgrim.  Some traditions are good to keep,

Now it is time for me to be honest.  I had a wonderful time, it was great to see everyone pitch in and try to make this day as normal as possible.  We laughed, we shed a few tears, we shared stories about Mom, and there were times when we were just quiet.  Don't get me wrong - it was a wonderful Thanksgiving celebration, but it didn't feel right not having Mom there with us.

Sixteen family members and friends gathered, however, there were times that the house just felt empty to me.  I know this is our new "normal", I am just trying to navigate what this means.

I have seen friends lose their Mom (Dad) and I saw their sadness and grief.  I just never realized how sad I would be.   There were so many times that I looked for Mom.  I wanted to see her smile.  I wanted to hear her laugh.  I wanted to hear my Mom make some funny comment.   I wanted to watch her beam as she looked at her grandchildren.  I wanted to watch her look down that long table at my Dad.

I tried to stay in the living room, kitchen and dining room.  It is still so hard and weird for me to see her nightstand without all of the medicine bottles.  It sucks to not see an outfit hanging on the door for the next day.  Mom was always prepared.

The chair lift that carried her upstairs even made me sad.  And yes, I know, the chair lift was such a necessary addition and was so helpful for her - it is just another reminder that Mom isn't with us to use it.

As a group we held it together really well.  I can only speak for myself, but that drive home was sad.  It was another slap in my face that Mom is no longer with us.  Let me rephrase that - Mom is in a better place and she is with us in spirit.  I am just being a bit greedy and needy right now and want to see her sitting in her chair and watching that big smile appear on her face when she realizes that we came over to see her.

They say that the first year is difficult because you have to experience a whole  year of holidays and events without your loved one.   They say I will find my new "normal."  Will someone tell me how it will be normal on my birthday when my Mom doesn't call and sing Happy Birthday to me?  How will it be normal on Mother's Day when I don't have a Mom to spoil?

OK - so now it is time for me to share something that makes me smile (and of course cry) - but mostly smile.  Mom and Dad called my cell phone a few months ago and left a voice message where they sang Happy Birthday to me.   As I listened to the message I was wondering why they were singing because it was months before my birthday.  I just listened and laughed - waiting to hear why they were doing this.  I knew they weren't "crazy".

Mom and Dad have a wicked sense of humor and I just had no idea why they were singing to me.  Well - as it turned out, the Happy Birthday song was declared for public domain and you can sing it for free (like you always did). hahahaha.  Here is the recording (yes, I was the smart one to save this beauty).  I never realized that I would need it so badly for my birthday in December.

Happy Birthday Voice Message from Mom and Dad - click to listen  

To be honest - hearing them sing makes me so happy and then it makes me so sad.  I have no idea what stage of grieving I am in and I don't really care.  I just know that right now I am sad and yes I cry.  I spent the Saturday after Thanksgiving curled up in bed, watching sappy Hallmark movies, eating junk food, and crying.  So much cheaper than retail therapy and by the end of the day, I felt better.

Grocery shopping sucks.  Not sure why.  It just seems that as I wander aimlessly around the aisles I get teary eyed.  Not sure what triggers it.  I can only imagine how the malls will be for me this year.  Wow - such confessions.

I am lucky to have had my Mom for so long.  I am lucky she didn't suffer.  I am lucky that she died with dignity.  My logical side knows this.

But I also know that I really really miss her.  My Mom was the one person that I could call and share my fears and concerns about life, especially Heather's health issues.  I could be honest with Mom.  I could tell her how scared I was and she would tell me that everything would be OK.  I know Dad will be filling this void - and that really does make me the luckiest girl in the world.

I love you and miss you Mom.  I hope your homecoming was as special as we all knew it was going to be for you.

If only.........if only I had told you a million more times that I loved you.

If only.........if only you could be here for future weddings, babies, birthdays and celebrations.

If only..........if only I could zip through these healing and grieving stages.

If only...........sigh

xo
lisa

Lauren, Lisa, Miranda, Brianne

Grieving - my inner 5-year-old self and "adult" Lisa.....

My Heather - 11/19/16

Before I begin, I am blessed that my Mom lived a long life and was able experience being a Grandmother and Great-Grandmother.  She was fortunate to have a long life with her children.  She was married for 62 years to the love of her life.  For that I am grateful.

Mom's health had been failing for several years.  It started with several surgeries for joint replacements, back surgery, a heart attack and heart surgeries.  You think you would be prepared for "that day", however I never realized how much it would hurt and how sad I would be.

My 5-year-old self wants my Mom to comfort me now.  I want her to call and check on me and tell me that everything will be OK. 

Adult Lisa, and I use that term lightly, knows that Mom had an amazing life, she is in a better place, she is no longer in pain, and her vision issues are resolved.  Mom was an avid reader and it was awful to see her not be able to voraciously read several novels a week.  Mom, the English Major, loved to read.

My 5-year-old self wants to help my Mom decorate the house for Thanksgiving and watch her prepare the family dinner.  We would be making hand-print turkeys to decorate the windows.  I would help her pull out the other decorations.  The pilgrim shaped candles that were never lit, but displayed for many years.  Let's not forget the classic cornucopia.  My favorite thing about Thanksgiving was her yummy stuffing and gravy which was made like her mother made it- using the giblets and homemade broth.  None of this boxed and packaged crap.  The real deal.

Adult Lisa will be part of the "team" this year preparing Thanksgiving dinner.  The other night Dad asked if I had Mom's stuffing recipe.  Sigh.  Sadly, the answer is no.  Mom was one of those cooks that didn't always follow an exact recipe.  I kinda/sorta know how it was prepared, but I never thought to have her write it down.   However, I do know that we will prepare a dinner that Mom would have proud of and we will gather as a family, share stories, laugh, and shed a few tears.

My 5-year-old self wants to climb into the back of my parents car and squirm with excitement, not wearing seat belts, as we drive over to my Grandmother's house for Thanksgiving dinner.  When we arrive we will play hide-n-go seek and run around the yard, careful not to get our special outfits dirty.  Then we will sit at that fabulous kids table and eat what we want, and hide the icky vegetables under some left over mashed potatoes or slip them under the table to an awaiting and hungry dog.

Adult Lisa will drive over to Dad's and revel in the beauty of watching Heather and her cousins continue our family traditions.  Lauren, Heather, Brianne, Miranda, and I will prepare our meal.  We will continue Mom's tradition of including dear friends at our table.  We will cherish our family tradition, but also create some new traditions.   The internet will allow us to decorate in a creative and artistic way that we will call our own, but stole from millions of other people that are googling "most creative thanksgiving table decorations."

Nothing against Martha Stewart, but we don't have a staff of 100 to decorate every inch of the table, entry way, kitchen and have homemade gifts for our guests.  Instead we will continue our new family tradition of the "white elephant gift exchange" at the end of dinner.  Who doesn't need a new dollar store item to make you laugh.  Nothing says family time better then getting to steal a favorite gift.

My 5-year-old self wants to fill her tummy with food (not worrying about calories), sleep on the way home, then be tucked into bed by my Mom.

Adult Lisa has no problems eating copious amounts of food and sharing a beverage or two.   Heather, the designated driver, will make sure we get home safely, then we will probably sit by a roaring fire and I will remember how thankful I am to have such an amazing family, boyfriend, girlfriends, and the best daughter I could have asked for.

I am thankful for sure.  I am blessed.  And...............I really really really really really miss my Mom.

xo
Lisa

PS - The picture was taken of Heather and her best friend Maggie years ago.  One Thanksgiving, the girls dressed up as pilgrims and delivered apples to the neighbors.  Soooooo cute.  Heather's comment upon seeing this - "we were so weird."  I beg to differ, they were creative, happy, unpredictable, and laughed all the time.

Who knew my Mom was a hair stylist

It's obvious that  Mom knew she had a natural talent for curling and cutting my hair when I was a child.  It's only been about 10 days since Mom passed away, but every time I see a picture from my childhood I reflect on the hilarious conversations we used to have about my childhood hair cuts.


First, my Mom loved short bangs.  The shorter the better, and the more uneven the more love that was put into the style.   I will admit that I probably was so wiggly during these sessions, that I didn't help with the length or the straightness.

When my hair grew longer, she mastered the art of curling.  Now remember, this was in the early 60's and the only way to get hair to stay curled was some "dippity do" green slimy hair gel and pink foam rollers that you slept in all night.  Add in the hair net and you have one HOT look.

Obviously, when I woke up, the curlers were removed and the hair wasn't brushed.  Mom seemed to love that "natural" curl that looked like a log around your head.

It also took me years to realize that if I raised my eyebrows when she was cutting, then the shorter the bangs would be.

As you grew older, there were some amazing technological advances.  Pink tape that kept your curls in place.  I suspect that my Mom may have placed this tape on my bangs then cut the hair above the tape.  Ahhhh the 60's.  So many wonderful new things that simplified life and so fashion forward.

With GG and Aunt Ruthie

So when Heather was 2 years old, Mom would watch her during the day for me.  It was Halloween and Mom decided that my little angel would look better with shorter bangs.  I walked in, saw Heather and fortunately I was mature enough to keep quiet.  It's only hair.  I also knew that I would be sharing this story one day.

Just for comparison, you can see my AMAZING hair cutting skills.  Yep, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  Gotta love the 80's and super long and straight bangs.

Don't get me started on this ridiculous hair dryer and bonnet that you sat under for hours.  It was like having a hair salon in your house -  NOT.  Classic.  I was so glad to see the invention of curling irons, and electric rollers.

I love you Mom.  Thanks for loving me and always making sure I looked my best.

I am so thankful that I was able to brush your hair you while you were in the hospital.  You seemed at peace while I pampered you.

Hairs to you Mom.  What I wouldn't give to have you brush my hair.  No offense, but lets leave the scissors to the professionals.

Right now I think Heather and I will keep our long locks of hair.

xo Lisa

I love you Mom - forever - to the moon and back......

Here is the eulogy that I wrote and presented at Mom's memorial service.  My Mom would have loved the outpouring of love and support that our family received.  So many people came to pay their respects.   The turnout was incredible, but not surprising.  Mom was loved by so many people.  Lauren's husband, Walter Beaudwin, conducted the service and reflected on the amazing, loving, beautiful and compassionate person that my Mom was.  My sister Lauren sang two of Mom's favorite hymns.  I know my Mom could hear her beautiful voice.  She so loved to hear Lauren sing.  It was a beautiful memorial and tribute to our amazing Mom.   We love you Mom.  

Here is my eulogy........
We would like to thank everyone for attending.  We are overwhelmed with grief, but also so blessed to have had such a wonderful Mother, grandmother and of course wife to my amazing Dad. Family was the most important thing to mom. 

My beautiful grandmother, with her gentle and peaceful demeanor, raised Barbara Jean Wiggins.  Mom was an only child and raised by her single Mom until she was 17 years old.  Mom grew up in Washington DC where she lived with her mother, Aunt Ruthie and her Granddaddy.  

During the summers, mom would go live with Aunt Eunice in New Jersey.  Imagine being away for the summer and the only form of communication with your mom is a handwritten letter, or if you were lucky an expensive long distance phone call.    Thank goodness for this village that raised Mom - she was always surround by loving and caring family members. 

Mom and Dad met in HS.  It always touched my romantic heart that dad wrote in her yearbook "To the future Mrs".  how cute is that?   Mom recently shared her diary with Lauren and she wrote the following about Dad:

Bill Butler - Wonderful guy - really the best ever.

another diary entry said:

I am going to see Bill tomorrow.  I hope he asks me to go steady. I really am crazy about him. No one else affects me like he does.

So there you go - true love - forever love.  Need I say more?   Of course I can say more about Mom.

Mom then continued to University of Maryland where she graduated with an English degree.  Mom, the college English major, always corrected our grammar.  Heck she corrected most people’s grammar.  As kids we would ask if we can outside to play and she would say, "You can go out, but you should have asked MAY I go out".  Her would be so proud that me be talking at you. If you don't let out a chuckle right now, then you didn't spend enough time with my Mom. 

Mom was raised with true family values. Family meant everything and family came first.  Growing up, our extended family gathered for most holidays and celebrations.  The adults would chat in the dining room and anyone under 18 would get to sit at that amazing "kids table".  There weren't any distractions like texting, Facebook, cell phones.  Our family just laughed, loved, and shared stories.  

Don't get me started about the amazing food.  Mom was an incredible cook and she loved to entertain.  You could drop in last minute and you were accepted with open arms.  You also left with a belly that ached from eating too much and from laughing so hard.  

  

What Mom really loved was when our family would get together.  The renewal of their wedding vows on their 60th anniversary was magical.   Mom and Dad rented an incredible ocean front home for two weeks.  Mom was in her element.  She was surrounded by her family and we spent quality time together.  For the second week of the trip they had their dear friends come stay. 

Mom, Dad and I recently watched some old home movies from the early 60s.  We were laughing at how every adult smoked cigarettes.  At my 5th birthday party, all my friends were dressed in their Sunday best.  You know – frilly dresses, patent leather shoes, white lacy socks.   

As we sat around the table waiting for the cake, Mom was holding the cake with one hand and a lit cigarette in the other.  She realized she needed both hands to place the cake in the middle of the table, so she held the cigarette in her mouth as she leaned over.  Classic.  We howled watching this. 

Mom loved holidays.  For her it was a chance to decorate her house and make special meals. Growing up we had pink cupcakes with conversation hearts for Valentine's Day.  On St. Patrick’s Day we ate green scrambled eggs or green mashed potatoes.  April Fool’s day was fun. One time she put brown circles of construction paper between our stacks of pancakes.  

Mom’s house was always decorated for the season and she welcomed anyone and everyone to her dinner table.   About 20 years ago Mom and Dad stared to travel extensively around the world and she started collecting nativity scenes from various countries.  Christmas was magical at our house.  

Mom was that person that always remembered what was important to people and always reached out to her friends and family in good and bad times.   She loved buying birthday cards months in advance, then addressing them with the date they should be mailed.  On her special day, the mantle was filled with cards and the phone rang non-stop. 

Mom had the largest circle of friends.  No offense to my siblings, but mom's social life trumped our combined social lives.  She kept in touch with friends from elementary, high school, college, neighborhood friends, and union friends.  

She loved spending time with her Joy boy ladies.  This group of amazing women helped their friend Bev Ross produce a junior Broadway musical that was performed by 5ith graders at the local elementary school.

I would be remiss if I didn't mention their "Reagan Riffed Federal Employee" brunch group (of course, I had to be political for a second - mom would have expected that).  As you can see her circle of friends was vast.

As for my childhood, I was that child that HATED to leave my mom.  When I was five, she would run an errand and leave me with neighborhood children and I would cry until she returned.  Sounds kind of bratty to me - but I missed my Mom.  

Here's a pretty good confession - In 7th grade, I went with my friend to their cabin on the river, and I was so homesick that I broke my retainer because I knew my parents would have to come pick me up.  I knew that precious money was invested on my pearly white teeth.  Mom never made me feel bad that they had to pay more money for another retainer.  She never accused me of intentionally breaking it.  She just brought me home.  That car ride home was so comforting.  And that bedroom.  Safely down the hall from my mom.

I am most grateful for everything Mom did for Heather.   After I gave birth to Heather, Heather was readmitted to the hospital for a pretty serious surgery.  Mom was there with me throughout that difficult time. I knew I would be returning to work, and I had never considered asking my Mom to provide child care for me.  However, when Heather was finally released from the hospital, Mom insisted that she take care of Heather.  

Four days a week Heather went to my parents for the day.  It was the best, most generous and loving gift that anyone has ever given me.  From that day forward, Heather and Mom formed this amazing bond.  

Mom loved all her grandchildren and great grandchildren - her heart was so big that there was always room to give more love.  

Some of you may not know why all the grandchildren call my Dad by his first name.  When Heather was little she heard my mom call dad down for breakfast in the morning and Heather would hear Mom say "Bill - breakfast is ready".   Heather would then mimic and say Bull "bweakfast". So Bull became the official name for my dad and eventually it changed to Bill.  When their friends asked why she was Grandma and he was Bill, Dad would laugh and say "I'm not old enough to have grandchildren - but Barbara is".

Mom was honest, hardworking, loving, and consistent.   You knew what to expect from her.  She also didn't live with regret and she looked forward to what tomorrow had to offer.  She knew at the end of that day the she did her best and she loved her family unconditionally.  

I know Mom is watching right now and smiling.  She knows how hard this is for me - we have had that sad talk at various times throughout life.  I would cry and tell her I don't want to ever lose her and she would reassure me that she would always be with me.  

Mom, I know you are with us.  

Before I close I want to share a story about mom during her final week in the hospital.  Mom was a fighter and because of side effects from the pain medicine she wasn't able to have anything by mouth for most of her stay.  

Anyone that knows her well is fully aware of her love for one bottle of Pepsi every day.  It seemed like every hour my Mom asked anyone and everyone for a Pepsi.  When she was in ICU and the end was near, one of the ICU doctors asked if they could do anything special for Mom.  We told him about her love of Pepsi, not Coke.  We already knew that the hospital only sold Coke so it didn't seem that anything could be done.  

Well, about 30 minutes later this compassionate Doctor came back with cold bottle of Pepsi in a CVS bag.  He left the hospital to go get her a final Pepsi.  She wasn't able to drink it, but she did smile when we used the green swabs to let her taste her Pepsi.  It’s the simple things in life you know.  This Doctor was compassionate, caring, loving, and he put a smile on all of our faces during one of our saddest moments.  

As I end this tribute to my Mom, I hope that you have learned something from this amazing woman and you can pay it forward in some way to someone in need.  It may be as simple as a phone call, a card in the mail, sitting bedside with someone and just being there for them.  Mom put others needs in front of her own.  She was generous, compassionate, loving, and had a wicked sense of humor.  I would share some of her jokes and stories but they aren't appropriate for this church setting.  

We love you Mom.  Thanks for being the best mom in the world.  Tell GG, Aunt Ruthie, and Aunt Eunice that I look forward one day to an amazing family dinner and lots of hugs.  

Another thing - Mom, I'm sorry that I didn't follow royal protocol and wear a hat and gloves fit for a Queen.   At night when I sip on a glass of champagne, a cosmopolitan or a Pepsi, I will raise my glass and make a toast to you. We love you Mom.  Forever and always. 

And then I saw my daughter take care of my mother.....

Heather and my Mom - 1984 - beach bums

For those of you that don't know, my Mom fell and broke her hip last week. Because of the blood thinners that she takes, surgery was delayed three days in order for the blood thinners to get out of her system.  In the mean time, they were managing her pain.

It has been five days since her surgery and sadly, she is still dealing with sedating effects from the anesthesia and the pain meds.  She also has a blood infection.   Mom is being such a trooper. It just breaks my heart to see her struggle.   She is strong and she has family with her at all times and we know her vast group of friends are praying.   Thank you,


Let's go back to 1982.  When Heather was an infant my mother offered to babysit Heather when I returned to work.  It was the most generous gift I have ever received.  It was such a comfort to be able to drop off Heather at my Mom's for the day.  It warmed my heart that they developed this incredible bond. 


It's funny to look back and reflect on how you were raised and the person that you became.  When I look at Heather, I can tell that Heather was raised by my Mother.  Not to be conceited or anything, but I find that a really good thing. I think we both turned out pretty good.   But once again, I digress. 


Since Mom's hospitalization, Heather has spent countless hours at the hospital taking care of Mom.   One day as I approached her room, I saw all the nurses and Heather helping Mom.  If you didn't know any better, you would have thought that Heather was part of the medical team. 


It was difficult, yet beautiful, to see Heather taking care of her Grandmother.  I watched in awe as Heather patiently spoke to my Mom, helped feed her, held her, told her stories, and comforted her.  .

I was going to title this blog "role reversal", but this really isn't a role reversal.  Mom will always be Heather's Grandma, and Heather will always be Mom's granddaughter.  What a gift it is for me to watch my precious daughter care for her beautiful Grandma. 


I am in awe of Heather's patience with my Mom.  It makes me reflect on the thousands of times that I saw my Mom caring for Heather.  I am so proud of everything Heather is doing for my Mom. 




Thank you Mom for helping me raise my compassionate and loving Heather.


Thank you Heather for taking such good care of my Mom. 


I love you both to the moon and back.  Forever. 
Prayers please.


xo
Lisa 

Paying it forward

One of the things that I have learned is that one of the most precious gifts you can give is the gift of your time.  It may be as simple as spending time with your family, offering a lending hand to someone in need, or just listening to someone.

Since Heather has been sick, she is constantly looking to find her now "normal."  She doesn't have the stamina to work yet, but she is always looking for things to do that give her structure, make her feel involved, and keep her body and mind active.

Chronic diseases can take over your focus on life.  As I have said before, Heather is already living with her health issues, she doesn't want to dwell on them and give them more power.

In the last few months Heather's health has really improved.  She finally has an appetite, she is slowly gaining weight, her brain fog is improving, and she is excited about what tomorrow brings.  A few weeks ago Heather decided to do some volunteer work.  She thought about her options and decided to give her time helping with the presidential election.

Before I proceed, this blog isn't about politics or anyones political beliefs.  It is about my wonderful daughter and watching her learn a valuable lesson in life.  The gift of volunteering.

Heather is now spending several hours each day volunteering.  It makes me smile to see that she is regaining her confidence, she has structure to her day, she is excited to go help, she is meeting new people, she is able to use her amazing organization skills, and she is happy about what she has accomplished.

Seriously, she is so happy when she returns from her volunteering.  It reminds of her teen years when she would come home from a competition or performance and she would share her adventures with me.

Of course I am biased, but when Heather is assigned a task, she gives it her full attention.  She is a worker bee and she is only looking for the self gratification that she did the best that she could.  Heather found the perfect volunteer position and I am so proud of her.

So - let's go back to 2005.  Heather had been in NYC for a few years and I had way too much free time on my hands.  I knew that I needed to pay it forward, so I decided to volunteer for a Pediatric wing at a local hospital.   As a volunteer, I was given a list of patients/children that didn't have a family member with them.  Yes, sadly some children were by themselves in the hospital.  It wasn't because the parents didn't want to be there, but because they had children at home or a job that didn't allow them to take off extra time.  There were many reasons.  It didn't matter why, what mattered was what I could do for them.

I  must admit that there were days that I was feeling sorry for myself about a tough day at work or a personal problem, but after I would return from my volunteering I  realized that I was getting back more than I was giving.  Seriously.

I was giving my so called "spare" time, but I felt guilty that I got back so much more.  You think you are having a bad day, well watch the fear in a parents face as their sick child is wheeled away for a procedure.  Or watch a sick baby in their crib with tubes hooked up and fear in their eyes.

My responsibilities as a volunteer were varied. Sometimes I would just sit and hold a baby, sometimes I would play a game with a child, or read a book.  What did I get back from these sick children?  Well, it was usually a smile, a laugh or that fearful look in their eyes subsided for maybe a second.  It's not like I was doing anything special.  I was just there.  I took time out of my so called scheduled and hectic life and spent a few hours a week at the hospital.

An added bonus was the generic blue volunteer jacket and sensible shoes and pants required for the job.  Anyone that knows me well is aware of the struggle to conform and wear a uniform.  I like to think I am a "fashion before function" type of girl but this time it was "function and zero fashion."   Shocking, I know.

Enough about me - let's go back to Heather.

Heather can't control the many health issues that is battling, but she can control how she approaches each day and how she can return to her new "normal."   Heather loves volunteering.  She has met so many amazing people that are also selflessly giving their spare time.  Heather is happy.  What does that mean........well Lisa is happy now too.   Ha - it always comes back to me now doesn't it.

In Heather's previous work life in NYC, she was focused on her job and the demanding hours that were required.  She tried to find that perfect balance between  work and play.    There didn't seem to be enough time in the day to volunteer.   She now knows that there is never enough time to accomplish everything.  You just need to reprioritize your activities and there is always an hour or two a week that you can use to help others.

Yes, I am fully aware that Heather does have a lot of time on her hands right now to volunteer.    Heather would rather be working her crazy hours rather than deal with her chronic health issues.  I am just so proud that Heather is focusing her energy and time and paying it forward.

I am sitting on a blog that I wrote a month ago that has an update about Heather's health.  We will share that one later after additional tests are performed.

Heather - you never cease to amaze me.  The smile on your face when you come home from the campaign office is priceless to me.  You picked the perfect volunteer job for this point and time in your life.   I am so proud of you and so glad that you are feeling better each day.

xo
Lisa

Our last day in NYC - 2016